Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Momma Daily!?!?!

       I should have called this blog "momma will get to this when she has time". It's been quite busy here.We've been packing some stuff up to get a head start. I freaking hate packing and the sound of packing tape is like nails on a chalkboard. Also tons of fun is my keyboard sucks! The spacebar will randomly not work and the letter "A" tends to not well as the number "4". So if you find some words strung together or missing letters, that's why. The screen doesn't even stay open...i have to prop it against 2 pillows to stay open. It's GREAT! G bought a new laptop for himself and i'm stuck with the shit one. I deal though.
                                            this stuff makes my ears bleed

       He got his official acceptance to take the police exam so his flight is all set up. I'm praying he doesn't fuck it all up. This moving thing is just grting on me...grr see there'smymissing "A" oooooo and keyboard mess stays. Trying to get everything together, figuring out when we're going to make the official move. Sometimes I feel super guilty about taking the boys away from family, but i'm hoping soon enough we can take an awesome Disney trip and that should make it better right!?!?

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Saturday nights have new meaning..

       I remembered when I was young, both single and not, and Saturday night was all about getting dressed up and going out partying. It's just after 9pm here and i'm in my pj's. I AM drinking some wine tonight because I convinced the babydaddy to wake up with the baby for his middle of the night bottle. Taking advantage of that. I have times where I do miss those days. Sleeping in....ooooooooooo sleeping in how i've missed that. Even when I just had E, he'd sleep until 830/9am so I'd actually get a full night of sleep. It was pure loveliness. I'm sleep training the shit out of N so he can do that as well. I am NOT a morning person at all. I do miss going out, being carefree...having friends. I'm pretty much dwindled down to a few since i started the baby making at 24. Which now looking back seems so young to me. I'll never regret my children because I love them, but I do regret not enjoying my youth a bit more. So if anyone young is reading this..wear a condom...because you will get pregnant and die. Mean girls anyone?

                                                        That is SO fetch!
       Speaking of condoms, I still haven't called the family planning people. I was supposed to make a 6 week check up appointment so I'm wondering if they'll remember I was supposed to go. Probably not though so I'm not expecting a phone call. But i do need to figure out some sort of birth control option. Other than that, I packed two boxes up of just books. So you know, after we move I can read these books over again for the 3rd or 4th time. It's hard finding the motivation to do it all because you know..I'm lazy most of the time. Ok not lazy, tired. I'm tired most of the time. Partially lazy and mostly tired..there..found a balance. Well my wine is getting warm..time to chug it down and get a refill then head off to slumber land.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

My body hates me

       So I'm 4 days post-Mirena self removal. Monday started the lovely crimson wave. I figured it would come but man, it sucked. I mean it only was for 2 days, but i think it was my body's way of saying "F- you...stop fucking with me!" I was actually deciding if I should call the family planning office to tell them what I did and get some normal ole birth control pills, but I think I'll wait before messing around with my body again. In my "youngin days" I took ortho tri cyclen lo for 4 years without a glitch but that was also before kids...and hormone changes...and sleepless nights. Maybe I'll wait. Plus, I'm afraid if I call them to tell them what I did they'll freak out on me telling me what kind of damage I might have done. Which makes no sense because they do the same exact thing to remove it...except I'd have to fork over a hefty few hundred dollars for them to do it. Yeah, family planning covers the cost of insertion, but to remove that devil horned'll cost you. Like I said, it's been 4 days and I'm not in any pain so I'm going with the assumption that I didn't rip my cervix apart.

       Now we're in October, that puts us at 3 months until the big move! I haven't started packing but I need to get on that. I just don't even know where to start. Plus I need boxes so nothing is getting done until I have those anyway. A friend of mine's husband should be able to get some so tomorrow during our playdate maybe we can get things moving. Speaking of which I need to clean like a madwoman today. Our apartment isn't filthy, but with 2 young kids it's not exactly guest presentable at all times. This gives me a reason to actually get my ass in I don't have to leave the house and I have 1 child not bothering me for the whole day ( which with him hanging on my back right now, I could use him being entertained by someone other than myself).

       I'm also ready to start getting my butt back in shape. With E i started at 138, with N I started at 148 and I'm currently 153. Depressing. Especially when I'm moving to a state where it's volcano hot in the summer and will be wearing shorts a good portion of the year. No one likes a pair of thunder thighs. Plus I have a damn elliptical machine in my lazy can I be!?!?! So my goal is to get down to where I was when I got pregnant with E. I'm not good at the diet thing so we'll see how this ends up. But maybe doing this blog will give me some sort of accountability.

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Mirena Shmirena

       So.....I went in Friday to get my Mirena put in. Of course my days never go easy so I get there, kids in tow, and was told I couldnt have them in the room. So a lovely woman from administration came and walked them around which was fine..i'm there so damn often everyone knows me and the boys. Then I was asked if I ate a big meal beforehand...uhhhh no. Apparently I wasn't told to do this either. Gee, thanks Docs for keeping me in the loop. Made me feel so much more prepared to get this evil devil horned thing put into me. Yes devil horned...we'll get to that. So I get undressed and get on the table, she does the speculum and explains what she's going to do. Well this was after I had a freakout and I had to re calm myself down. But she puts this iodine stuff i guess on my cervix and then sprays this shit that burns on it.I think it's to help numb it. So she measures my cervix and i'm thinking "oh this isn't so reason to be scared" and then she goes to insert it and CRAMP! What made it even better is that the Mirena decides to fall out so she has to reinsert it a second time and HOLY MOLY CRAMP! My friend had hers done and told me it wasn't any worse than a pap. Yeah well i guess if during your pap you feel as if your insides are trying to battle themselves then yeah, i guess you could say it's comparable.

                                           Yes..i put devil horns on the Mirena...

       I was in pain with the cramping. And as I sat up I almost passed out ( which is why they say to eat a good meal). I was given 2 Aleve to take to help with the cramping which once it kicked in was better. I did notice i had some pain in my knee shortly after insertion..strange but it actually didn't subside. I figured it was just my body needing to adjust to it and went and brought N to his appointment. The one good thing for the day was not getting harassed for declining vaccines. Didn't get talked to or anything so at least one thing in my day went right. As the day progressed i noticed I was becoming really gassy and bloated..because I'm trying to not look 5 months pregnant anymore. So yeah, that was bothering me. But then my mood started changing. I all of a sudden started feeling depressed. And not in the "I'm having a bad day" king of depressed.It was a "what if i took a bottle of pills" depressed. Yea, not normal or okay. I realized I wanted it out..and now!

       I did some googling ( yes i said not to google about procedures but I was desperate!) and found that a lot of women were successful in removing it themselves. I figured what the heck, let's try.Well yesterday I could get a hold of it but I was determined to get that fucker out. I dropped trou, laid on the bathroom floor, reached up, found the thread and got a grip on it, ( it feels like fishing line, no wonder I felt it poking me) gave a little tug and out it came. Not a cramp, no blood...i didn't even realize it was out until it was in my hand. I'm wondering if it wasn't placed properly. But i figured since it was just inserted it wouldn't have had time to get embedded and what not. I'm only slightly sore from having to shove my fingers up there to grab the threads. But no more  gas, i don't feel bloated, no more knee pain. And whatever that depressed fog it put me in has lifted. Now I know it works great for some people but for me,it just didn't agree. So beware!!!!

Friday, September 28, 2012

Can we do this right today??

       So I went for my no more making babies appointment yesterday, except whoever made it put it as a counseling appointment. With a colic baby and a 2 year who missed his nap, trust me, no one had to convince me to do something. Of course I flipped out because i wasted a good almost 2 hours of my day to not even get the birth control which was the reason to go in the first place. Pissed off is an understatement. I go back this morning and then right after we have N's 2 month visit. No shots for him either so no biggie. Yes, I have my own stance on vaccines and I'll do a post on all the different views I have....that's what makes the world go round.

                                                      Get in my belly ( well... uterus)

     In all happiness, it's Friday. Not that actually matters because I'm a stay at home mom so my days pretty much blend into one another. But tonight is daddy's night for baby duty. Not like I actually sleep the whole night because he stomps like an elephant and turns on the lights which wakes me up, but at least I don't have to physically get up. Better than nothing right? I'm truly shot by Friday though. Last night N decided 2:15 was a good time to eat instead of his usual 4. That made me so happy I stayed up until 10 so I could catch Glee. Man, that Finn just walked into a sticky situation, but i digress.

                                                          THIS is my crack...

       So the plans for the day: Actually get the damn IUD put in. Preferably correctly. Never google things you're going to get done...ever. I'm expecting the worse but 5 years without having to use extra brain cells remembering a pill is just so much easier. Have N's appointment and expect to get lectured on my lovely vaccine choice, which is a choice that I'm allowed to make. But I'm sure it will extend our appointment a good 15 minutes or so. Thirdly, get through the day without E having more than 10 or so tantrums. Terrible Two's is an understatement.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

New starts??

       So here I's 7:30am and I just fed my 9 week old. Good thing I waited until after he ate because trying to type this out with one hand would have taken me forever. He's sitting in his bumbo next to me and he's damn lucky he's cute because I've been up since 3:45 dealing with his shenanigans. I'm not entirely sure why I want to write a blog. I guess because we're about to embark on a crazy journey in the next few months and feel I need some way to document it. See, we have our 9 week old, and then there's our 2 year old. You think that alone could be a lot to deal with but no, we've decided to move across the country in just a few short months. Just thinking about it exhausts me...well maybe that's because I have yet to drink my morning pot of coffee.

        A little background: We live in the great ( but extremely expensive) state of New York. Make that the great ( but even more extremely expensive) Long Island. And no i don't live next door to Billy Joel or Lindsay Lohan, although some days I think I could use the booze. My boyfriend and I were both born and raised here but over the course of our lives, it has become much harder to make a living here. (Yes, I said boyfriend. It's quite a long story that maybe one day I'll get into.) The cost of living here has just gotten to be too much to give us or our boys a good life. I have family in Arizona so we'll be staying with them until we get our feet on the ground and then hopefully we can go out on our own. So even though it's across the country we won't be entirely alone. But still...pretty scary and life changing!

                                                          Our Little Family

       So the plans for the day...well number one was accomplished and that was getting the baby to sleep. E, our 2 year old, however ,should be waking up shortly so there goes my chance of sleep. What??? 3:45AM isn't a reasonable time to get up for the day?? LOVE colic! Number two is to go to my family planning appointment to get birth control because i really, i mean REALLY can't go through getting pregnant again. I'm pretty sure if that happens I will find the nearest cliff and jump off it because some days that sounds like a legit plan. I was thinking of the Mirena, although after my ( almost everyday) early morning wake up call I may just tell them to take my whole damn uterus out.